| Posted in:Family
It’s been summer vacation for the last month and it has been GLLLLORRRRIOUS!
“Whaaaat?” you ask. “Hasn’t this been the worst summer Ontario has experienced in decades?
Okay; I concede that the weather does indeed suck sweaty crushed parts. It is true that it has rained every single day since June 12th 2007, and last night’s weather report was just a really pissed off looking weatherman standing under an umbrella shouting, “I got nothin’, people! NOTHING!” Then he threw the umbrella at the camera man in disgust and disappeared off screen to a crack of lightning, several off-colour words and interesting adjectives.
But it’s all sunny skies as far as I’m concerned. I’ve hired a fantastic babysitter who not only tolerates, but enjoys Lego, and I haven’t had to pack a lunch in almost 30 days. In fact, I haven’t even MADE a lunch in 30 days. But the absolute best part of the summer by far is NO MORE GRADE FOUR MATH HOMEWORK.
Yesterday, while blissfully browsing the shelves at Chapter’s Bookstore, I came across a dusty corner that I had never noticed before. Usually when I go to the bookstore I have the kids with me, and so spend my time talking my kids out of books like “Dogs and Other Super Fun Pets Your Mom Won’t Buy” and “Fire, Hammers, and Household Chemicals: Jimmy Makes His Own Fun!”
But here was a section that I had not ever seen before. It was marked simply “Math.” I laughed and thought, “Who READS about math?”
Math literally makes my face hurt. I carry a calculator with me in my purse and would be lost without it. Yet here were books, MANY books about the supposed joys of Calculus, Algebra, and Geometry. I cannot imagine any circumstance under which I would ever purchase such a book. Sudoku books should be required to come with a cyanide tablet, or, at the very least, an Advil and package of Margarita mix.
I never understood that whole controversy a few years back about the Barbie Doll who quipped, “Math is hard!” MATH IS HARD!
People who can convert imperial to metric without a calculator or tell you without Google how to find the volume of a circle based on radius? Freaks.
But let it not be said that I am a disillusioned fool; I know the reprieve from math is short lived. September is quickly approaching and we all know what that means.
Grade FIVE math homework.