| Posted in:Food, Health, Writing

jeni16 2 Notes to my 16 year old self

No makeup...full sunlight...those were the days.

 Last week I participated in the Twitter Meme #tweetyour16yroldself. But my 16 year old self could not be set straight in a mere 140 characters, so I am #bloggingmy16yearoldself.

Pay attention, Jeni. 

P.S. Your boobs look fantastic. You’re going to miss that.   

  • There’s this thing called ‘the internet’ coming down the pipe. Look into ‘Google.’ Find out who is starting it up, and then make him your boyfriend.
  • It’s not an age thing; lots of people older than you really ARE idiots.
  • Call your Grandparents more often.  Ask them about the War. Tell them “Thank you,” and then go write it down.
  • Moisturize.
  • Don’t settle.
  • Join every club and group that appeals to you. It doesn’t matter if you don’t know as much as the other members do. This is how you LEARN things, my dear.
  • That guy? He’s is creepy and you’re right in thinking so. 20 years later you’re going to read about him, and it isn’t going to be under the headline “Man Wins Nobel Prize for Single Handedly Solving World Hunger and Saves a Homeless Puppy En Route to Ceremony.”
  • Keep wearing your seatbelt.
  • Tim Horton’s will not have a pie counter forever. Take advantage.
  • DO NOT doodle his name on your ‘Led Zeppelin’ album covers.
  • Write more. Read more. Study more.
  • Drink stolen apricot brandy from a canning jar under a bridge with your friends less.
  • Wipe off 60% of your eyeliner. You look ridiculous.
  • DO NOT quit school next year. Yes, it’s boring as hell, it’s not challenging, yadda yadda, but it’ll save you from being a 37 year old Undergrad with a serious student loan and a blood pressure prescription.
  • Start a retirement savings plan. Then maybe you’ll be drinking Margaritas on Cocoa Beach at 45 instead of domestic draft beers at the local watering hole.
  • Travel. Cross border shopping runs to Buffalo for Sugar Smacks and Aleve DO NOT COUNT.
  • Not everything is your fault, but some things are. Learn the difference.
  • Why are you smoking? So not cool, my dear.
  • Some people are just not worth the tear soaked, snot blown Kleenex they inspire.
  • Learn how to play the guitar. Do not give up because you’re not John Prine in 2 weeks.
  • Buy the damn yearbook, already. You’ll wish you had it later.
  • Take your driving instructor seriously – hitting a car in the parking lot of the testing centre does not exactly inspire confidence.
  • You can’t really change people. You can however, intimidate them.
  • You may be younger than the jar of pickled beets in your dad’s cold cellar, but you still have a voice. Use it.
  • During the 1989 holiday season do not – I repeat – DO NOT consume an entire Hickory Farms Gift Cheese/Smoked Meat Platter and then a bottle of Blue Curacao at a party. It will not end well, and several people will not look you in the eye for close to a year.
  • Foster your girl-friendships. Treat each other as equals, not competition.
  • Keep your bits of writing. Even if it’s just to laugh at later, you’ll want to have it.
  • Your bleached splattered jeans with the holes in the knees that you so carefully fashioned with sandpaper and nail scissors? HIDE THEM. Your dad is going to throw them in the wood stove.
  • You will have children. They are going to drive you absolutely batshit crazy.
  • You will love it. (Most of the time.)
  • http://www.smacksy.con Lisa Rae @smacksy

    Beautiful.

  • Jen

    Hey Jeni, love it! It we were only smart enough to listen to what people with experience were telling us…..

  • http://www.melissagay.wordpress.com Melissa

    ha! way better then mine. I had added “find the boy who invents facebook. marry him. spend all his money” but I deleted it… haha!

    great post. Makes me think of a few more things I would tell my 18-21 year old self!

  • http://heartonhomestead.blogspot.com/ Jessica

    “You can’t really change people. You can however, intimidate them.”

    Love that one! You got a great list, now…tell your 16 year old self to call MY 16 year old self and tell her all these things! Haha

  • Sheri

    Love this Jeni!

  • http://www.purpleandsparkly.blogspot.com Kate

    Oh, please… oh, please…
    Save this for your daughter and give it to her when she’s 16. Better yet, give her a copy and save a copy for when she’s made some mistakes and starts asking for your advise.
    Yep, it WILL happen. She may be 40 but it’ll happen. Then you’ll be a genius in her eyes.

  • http://runesmith.blogspot.com Jennifer Smith

    Mine should have been, “When you ask Jeff Skoll to the prom, don’t take ‘no’ for an answer. He looks like a dork now, but he will go on to become the first president of eBay and a billionaire philanthropist. And yes, he gets his teeth fixed.”

  • http://www.haffnewie.wordpress.com hi-d

    Love it! Some GREAT advice!

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